Haduken

Quarterly Retired Report

by: Susan

Officially Retired as of Fall 2007:
1. “Tell us how you REALLY feel.”
2. “Best. XYZ. Ever.”
3. Ladies Night
4. Trying to retire the process of retiring (permanently)
5. SNL Movies
6. Wes Anderson (until further notice)
7. American Apparel
8. “World’s tiniest violin.”
9. Biopics
10. Mockumentaries
11. Giuliani
12. Social networking sites

Newly out of retirement:
1. Dudical
2. Exactamundo
3. High waists
4. Super Mario Bros. 3
5. “HOO HOO HOO HOO” (aka “The Arsenio Hall”)
6. “Chill Win-ston.”
7. Phil Collins

On the chopping block:
1. Tapered jeans
2. Superhero films

Please update your records.

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  1. [...] Please go here to see the Quarterly Retired Report. [...]

    — Made in Richmond » FYI | @

  2. Super Mario Bros 3!
    We started that 6 months ago, Mel has been hitting Super Mario Bros. 1 pretty hard too. We even have to blow into the cartridge and smack the NES to SMB3 going sometimes.
    1985 sweetness!

    — Kamen Lee | @

  3. SMB3 = greatest game ever made.

    — andrew hunter | @

  4. DUDE, COIN SHIP!!

    — Susan | @

  5. Who the hell retired Phil Collins? TELL ME WHO.

    — Ross | @

  6. someone who never tasted his brother Tom.

    — nic | @

  7. Unretired: Blowing on NES cartridges and smacking the console around.

    — Susan | @

  8. Whoa, I never smack my console around. That is why mine is PRISTINE.

    — Ross | @

  9. The Wii Virtual Console should include a “blow in the cartridge and smack the console around” function. Just sayin’.

    — andrew hunter | @

  10. Haha you could blow on the Wiimote. It’s probably got weird blowing sensors — it’s got everything else.

    — Ross | @

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