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Pan’s Labyrinth: there are easier ways to become a communist

by: Ross

RMSzero and I ventured out of the (relative) safety of the city limits to catch a flick at the Short Pump Move Complex. Aside: Isn’t it odd that when you live inside the city limits you feel more comfortable among bums and transvestitutes than rent-a-cops and soccer mom’s that insist on driving while chatting it up with their bestest girlfriend about neighbor Dave and how Kimberly saw him eating dinner at the clubhouse with Ashley the sixteen year old babysiter?

Anywhoo, don’t worry about us. We went, we saw, and we got the hell out of their alive — barely. The movie on the menu was Pan’s Labyrinth or El Laberinto del Fauno, directed by Guillermo Del Toro. Del Toro is a mexican director “famous” for directing Hellboy and Blade II.

His dad was also kidnapped in 1988, wtf?

Pan’s Labyrinth is an interesting amalgamation of fantasy, horror, and war story. Basically what we have here is a fairy tale set during the Spanish Civil War with an appropriate amount of gristle. I’ll will admit, however, I had to squint at the screen during a scene that involved the SEWING OF HUMAN FLESH. I mean, some shit I just can’t handle.

I thought the visuals were awesome, specifically the creature design. I would have been happy, no happier, if we could just drop the whole Spanish Civil War thing and do more of the running away from creepy well designed monsters thing. But hey there was, as RMSzero said, “lots of plot.” YMMV.

The most interesting thing about Pan, other than the preview of 300 before the movie started, was the melding of horror and fairy tale. This isn’t a new idea, but one that we’ve forgotten about apparently. You might even say that this was how fairy tales started out before those bastards at Disney got ahold of them. Something about a horror flick starring an innocent little kid makes it EVEN MORE HORRORFUL.

I’d say, three point five stars baby — more for the visuals and the genre blending than anything else.


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  1. There was a lot going on. My problem was that I had a tough time suspending my disbelief. I mean, I can take the war parts of the movie at face value, but I get frustrated with imaginary worlds with poorly defined rules.

    You could say that this means I probably wouldn’t like most of magical realism as a film genre, and you would be right.

    So I mean if, say, magic fairy dust had turned her into a 30 year old woman, I could get behind that. Sure, that’s reasonable. But when Eye-Hand Man was after her, I was just annoyed at her for being stupid and bringing it on herself, especially after it was her own fault that some of her fairies got eaten. I just wasn’t on her side at all.

    Look. I enjoyed the visual style a lot. But if I’m not 100% into it, I can’t go higher than 3.5 stars. That’s just how I roll.

    — RMSzero | @

  2. That’s 3.5 out of 4. Damn netflix to hell for using a 5 star system.

    — RMSzero | @

  3. I mean, out of 5.

    3.5 out of 5.

    Okay, that’s it. Seriously.

    — RMSzero | @

  4. i just want to say it is nice to see haduken back to its roots with crazy ass pictures on the front page.

    labyrinths are cool.

    — midas | @

  5. Yeah, I agree with the poorly defined rules. That is why I wish there was more of the monsters and less of the Spaniards (not that they aren’t monsters — in the general sense).

    Maybe there was like an hour of footage that fills in the gap that was edited out. That is what it felt like at times though.

    — MaxPower | @

  6. That guy is probably the best part of the whole movie.

    — MaxPower | @

  7. How about this compromise: they eliminate the ridiculous magical fantasy from my movie and let it just be about a little girl caught up in a war, and they eliminate the war from your movie and let it be about a little girl’s fantasy. Cool?

    — RMSzero | @

  8. but then you would both have to goto your movies alone? or together to both, but it would cost twice as much.

    — midas | @

  9. I would go see both movies, and I bet they would be better movies.

    — MaxPower | @

  10. Pan’s Labrynth was nominated for a few academy awards.

    Best foreign language film of the year being the biggest.

    Here is the complete list

    — BK | @

  11. this guy was on fresh air this morning (npr). he sounded pretty cool and had a charming accent. some things:

    1) he said that he loves hellboy comics and that the hellboy movie is semi-autobiographical (?!)

    2) he said the faun in the movie is based on one that he has lucid dreams about

    3) apparently there are crazy insect fairies? these are because he always pictured the xtian archangels as giant armoured bugs (that’s why they are so tough).

    4) that people invented monsters to explain the world around them. then, when we became civilized, we use the monsters to explain the world inside OURSELVES.

    — midas | @

  12. Maybe it’s because Man is the real Monster.

    — RMSzero | @

  13. Eye-hand guy was definitely the highlight - though somehow not quite as scary as el Capitan… the scene with the wine bottle and the hunter… wtf? I hated that guy…

    — wolff++ | @

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